Siba... a lesson learned.

Needless to say, I love dogs. I have loved dogs all my life so when I had the opportunity to have a dog, I couldn't have been happier.

It always came natural to me... I love all animals but I am scared of cats. Yup cats. Well, ok not terrified of them but when you cant "read" an animals body language, cant really tell what they are thinking or how the react or why they do the things they do, you kind of stay away from them. Not that I am an expert with dogs but it just seems a better fit for me. 

Before the 2 I have now, I spent most of my life with Siba. I can never seem to talk about him enough. He was my first dog. A poodle mix. When I came to the island, I was very high strung and very reactive because of my parents divorce. So what better way to occupy myself than a dog? My father had the great idea of getting me a puppy. I wasnt ready and he came into my life for all the wrong reasons. But remained in my life for all the right ones. He became the love of my life and the lesson of a lifetime... unconditional love.

Siba as a puppy

He was a tough dog and I had no idea at the time as to how to raise him. He was housebroken fairly quickly but other than that... I didnt know what I was doing. I was a teenager and my fathers advice didnt help. Siba learned how to go for a walk with a choke chain. Yup... a choke chain. Fathers advice because Siba pulled. When he did something wrong, I had to slap him. Yup... slap him. Fathers advice because Siba was feisty. And I did. This dog got slapped... a lot. I once kicked him too... I used to scream at him to stop nipping, jumping up on me... you know all the things people did to dogs 30 years ago so that a dog would obey. He really didnt though. 

He was very strong minded for a small dog and I sometimes thought (I do until this day too) that he did things just to piss me off! (I am of course humanising his behavior, which wasnt the case). One thing that says who he really is, is this incident : we were out for a walk one day and I had him off leash in an empty lot (note: if your dogs recall isnt perfect DON'T have them off leash) and he was going about, sniffing, peeing the whole universe by lifting his leg as far as it could go and just being a dog. A motorbike came around and Siba thought it would be funny to chase it. Driver got a bit worried and panicked, leading to him running over my dog! I freaked out, of course and thought that my beloved brat was dead. By the time I could think or react, Siba jumped up and attacked poor mans leg... didnt bite him but the guy left as fast as he could. Thats what kind of dog he was... he wasnt hurt, thankfully but comes to show how fierce he was! 

When I moved out at the age of 18 due to problems I had with my father (better yet, he moved out and left and I continued living in the house we rented) Siba stayed with me. He was my dog and no way was my father taking him (not that he wanted him). Here we are, just the 2 of us, me being a complete mess as to where life is taking me and how crappy my life seemed at the time. I finished school, got a job, had my friends and got my life back on track after a year of going out every single night (my father never let me go out so I was doing mostly everything I didnt do while I lived with him, I was a good girl though, promise) and just enjoying my freedom of not having anyone telling me what to do. Down the road, friends disappeared, job got more serious, I was growing up fast... and Siba? He was always there. Waiting patiently, never wanting more than his food, a walk and to cuddle with me while I was home. He matured and I matured with him. 

He turned out to be my perfect dog. He understood everything and I found myself having long conversations with him... we would go for walks and he would always be off leash, he would come the minute I whistled. I left him alone for hours due to work, especially when I had 2 jobs and he never ever complained. He was just always happy to see me home. Then he slowed down... he was getting older. He went deaf and he had kidney issues. I promised him I would take care of him like he took care of me. And I really hope I did. I even promised him that I would build my house as quickly as possible so he could enjoy it too. I never took one single decision without keeping him in mind. When I found Mimika, he didnt want her though. She was a puppy and he was a senior dog so he didnt really want anything to do with her... but he tolerated her and they got along fine. 

So we move into our new house and he had a property now large enough away from busy streets and he could pee his heart out! He loved it... and I loved seeing him happy. But he slowed down even more... he would sleep most of the day and just wait for me to come home from work. He went blind from one eye, his trachea had collapsed and made him cough like an old man but his heart was still strong. We managed... on the 10th of April, 2012 I had to let him go on a rainy night. I still dont know what happened that night ... I still wonder if I could have done something to keep him with me. But he wasnt getting any younger and he was already 16. 

People come and go, they will hurt you, they will make you happy, they will teach you, they will use you, they will forget about you... but a dog wont. A dog will wag his tail for you, after a crappy day. And Siba was that kind of dog and I miss him terribly. He wasnt trained... he wasnt perfect... but he was MY perfect dog. He was my friend, my buddy, my pal. He taught me more than I taught him... I wish there was a way for dogs to be with us forever... but they come into our lives for one reason only : to teach us the meaning of unconditional love. Nothing more precious than that.